Tag Archives: modesty

Desperately Seeking Vashti: Three Lessons from a Deposed Queen

Culture, Daily living, Esther,

351px-Paolo_Veronese_-_The_Banishment_of_Vashti_-_WGA24786Vashti was beautiful to behold but today is overlooked and stands in the shadow of Esther. We must give Vashti her due.

Vashti is only mentioned in the first part of Esther.  Yet she leaves a legacy worthy of imitation for women today. ((I know modesty applies to men too but Vashti is especially well suited for women. ))

Vashti is queen to King Ahasureus of the Persian Empire. She lives about 500 year before the coming of Jesus. It is speculated that she was a granddaughter to one of the prior Medo-Persian kings but that cannot be verified. She gives a feast for the noble women of the kingdom while her husband does likewise for the men. Days of drinking and debauchery accompanied such parties especially for the men.

A week into the feast the king demands that Vashti come before the men to display her beauty. Some Jewish rabbinical writings assert she was to present herself nude or perhaps dressed only in her crown. The Bible is not that specific but it is clear she was to present herself in some immodest way before a room full of drunks.

Vashti refused.

Such a refusal is stunning in the 5th century BC. Women had almost no rights and the King was sovereign. Her refusal could cost her life. Instead, she was removed as queen and she disappears into history. But let’s give Vashti credit for standing up to the wicked intents of a powerful King.

There are at least three lessons here for women today.

Vashiti Knew That Modesty Never Goes Out of Style

As Queen, Vashti would have been the most beautifully dressed woman in the nation. She was a trend-setter of the day. It is clear from Esther 1:16-18 that her conduct was watched by other women in the kingdom. She set the standard. By refusing the King’s order she sent a message that the style of the day was modesty.

It’s clear today that others think the opposite: Immodesty never goes out of style.

Rising hemlines, plunging necklines and revealing clothes are the standard for our day and have been for many years. We have allowed the godless to set the rule for our daughters and the result is an ever increasing sexuality among younger and younger children. A modest, well dressed woman is beautiful and need not make a spectacle of herself in order to be attractive. Modesty must be our standard.

Vashti Knew That Someone Is Always Watching

Vashti was a queen and we are not surprised the women were watching her. People watch celebrities today and dress like them. But even among us common folk, people watch what we wear and will take cues as to what is acceptable.

Vashti was brave enough to set a standard for the nation. She was on the world’s stage and she knew how to influence the women of the kingdom. She knew more would be watching her than the King and his drunken buddies. She chose to send a message to them all.

You are sending messages by what you wear. And ladies, please remember, you are sending a message to your daughters too.

Someone once said that it was not her problem if a man lusted after her. She could wear what she wanted. Yet that attitude runs afoul of a multitude of clear Biblical teachings including the Golden Rule (Matthew 7:12) and Paul’s discussions of loving the brethren (Romans 14:21; 1 Corinthians 8:13; 1 Corinthians 10:23-33). Someone is always watching.

Vashti Would Bow to No Man

The idea that a woman is to be submissive to her husband is Biblical. But submissive does not extend to humiliation or sin. No man has a right to demand that his wife do anything that humiliates her or causes her to sin – not in public and not in private.

Some men demand their wives dress in revealing clothing as if to display their trophies to the world. A woman is under no compulsion to parade about publically in an immodest way. The Bible teaches that husbands are to loves their wives “as Christ loved the church” (Ephesians 5:25). Christ would never demand sin of his people would he?

Your body, your beauty, belongs to you. Vashti would not share her beauty with the drunken company of the King. Let’s learn from her.

 Bryant Evans may be reached at bryant at bryantevans.com. You can follow Bryant on Twitter @jbevans.

Women Turned Away from Church Because of Immodest Dress

Church, Culture, Worship,

A church in Kenya is asking some worshipers to dress more modestly. A woman was asked to go home and change because of her clothing. The reported comments suggest the issue of immodest dress is common in that particular church. The woman at the focus of the uproar is identified only as “Julia” and lives in Nairobi.

“Julia, who wrote on her Facebook page, expressed displeasure at the manner in which she was turned away. She claimed some other ladies wear mini skirts and spaghetti tops in big churches in the city.”

How to dress in worship is always an issue. But normally the question I hear is more about whether we should require a man to wear a coat and tie if he is leading in the public worship. Scantily clad women in worship have not yet made it onto the local radar screen. But until they do here are a few thoughts. There could be more but these come to mind this morning.

  1. Modesty is more than necklines and hemlines. Immodest attire is that which draws attention to the person. A man wearing a tuxedo to worship would surely be immodest as would a young man wearing a Budweiser T-shirt on the Lord’s table or a woman with a plunging neckline.
  2. Modesty is a judgment issue. The Bible does warn against immodesty (1 Timothy 2:9) but really gives no particular rules. Thus, culture will sometimes define modesty. If I wore a Sunday suit, complete with dress shirt, coat, pants, tie and shiny shoes to worship in Lethem I would draw attention to myself. Sometimes where we are may define modesty. Common Sunday best for women would be horrendously immodest in some locales.
  3. The outside may not define the inside. While our clothing may flow from our inner values it is also possible that it does not. Matthew 7:15 is clear that what we see on the outside may not define the inside (Mark 12:38-40). God views the inner man and so should we (1 Samuel 16:7).
  4. It does matter what you wear. Plunging, cleavage bearing necklines, short, thigh and  hip revealing hemlines and tight, buttocks accentuating sizes do incite lust. Let’s not play a game here. You know it. Should a true Christian be willing to alter their clothing standards if it helps someone else to avoid lust. Lust is bad (Matthew 5:28) but lust that actually distracts from worship must be even worse.
  5. Worship is not your mother’s funeral. A good brother once suggested that worship attire should be defined by what we would wear to our mother’s funeral. That sounded nice and was an easy line to blurt out in a discussion but it was also devoid of reason. First, contrary to some congregations, worship is not a funeral. It’s a joyous time when we come before the throne of Jehovah with praise and thanksgiving. We celebrate the victory in Christ and the resulting freedom from condemnation (Romans 8:1). Any sadness is taken away by the blessings in Christ. If a man chooses to leave is tie at home then who cares?

If we will think of others as we dress, modesty in worship will not be an issue. I promise, I will not make fun of your mid-belly tie if you won’t complain that I didn’t wear a tie at all.

When souls are dying lost, shall we really be concerned about such things as what a man wears at the Lord’s table?

Before you start the mailing campaign, I know that some dress is so egregious that it cannot be allowed in worship. My point here is to remind us to use better judgement and think righteously before making issue bigger than it should be.

Bryant Evans may be reached at bryant at bryantevans.com. You can follow Bryant on Twitter @jbevans.

On Modesty

Church Bulletin, Culture,

Summer is just around the corner. Warm days, beautiful skies and blooming flowers all point toward the changing of the seasons. It’s a marvelous time of year. I  know few people who don’t yearn for the coming of summer. But with the turning of the calendar pages comes a decrease in clothing. It’s wise to give some thought to modesty – for both genders – before we head out to enjoy God’s grand creation.

A dress code should be part of every person’s plan. How you present yourself in public speaks loudly about who you really are and who you represent. We are Christians, an ancient name adopted first by believers in Antioch (Acts 11:26). Those who wear the name self-identify as a believer in the Sonship of Jesus, as a learner of His teachings and a follower of his commands.

To wear the name must include a change of life away from the usual ways of the world. It is more than just a name – it is a way of life. First century Christians (and many since then) have given their lives for the way of life that is the Christian. They refused to change their allegiance to Christ even when facing horrible death. Consider the courage of Queen Vashti who refused to display her beauty in a vulgar way.

Now, we may not think it fair but it is true that people make judgments about us based upon what they see and not what we say.  We do it all the time. We say we are not interested in someone who “talks the talk” but instead we look for a person who “walks the walk.” How we conduct ourselves really does matter. How we dress really says something about us.

Have you ever wondered why salespeople in high-end clothing stores always dress nicely? They are sending you, the customer, a message about the importance of dressing well. Why do successful attorneys wear business attire in the courtroom? They want to be perceived as a professional. Book after book has been written about how to dress well. Dress for Success has been reprinted and updated year after year and remains a big seller. Why? Because the clothes we wear tell people who we are.

What message do you deliver on the weekend?

Now if you are expecting me to give specific details on the length of a hem or how long sleeves should be of the length of an inseam you will be disappointed. The Scriptures offer no such instruction.  Our faith is of the heart. It much more than following a bunch of rules. Instead our lives flow from our hearts which have been made pure by Jesus Christ and the cleansing rebirth we enjoyed at our baptism. So what standard should we use?

  1. Would I be embarrassed if Jesus physically stood before me while I am dressed in this way?
  2. Do my clothes invite others to stare or leer at me?
  3. Am I constantly fighting my clothes to keep from showing too much?
  4. Was I uncomfortable the first time I wore these clothes in public, or am I now uncomfortable?
  5. Do I make it more difficult for others to have a Christian mind when they are around me?

We live in near paradise here. The weather is beautiful and we are surrounded by water. Like the mighty mountain peaks the snow white beaches are a gift from God. The beach can be enjoyed if we give a little thought to where we go, when we go and what we wear. You are not your own. You belong to Christ so honor him in all you do!

“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price, therefore, glorify God in your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6:19, 20)